Writings for Sylvia
Writings for Sylvia
Fly high Little Dove
 
 

Our life in tiny squares

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Whipping up a sweet and tangy lemon pie for Easter with these beautiful, near orange yolked eggs a sweet friend gave to us. Forming traditions, I’ve come to find out, has been something surprisingly important to me as a parent. I don’t know if the lemon pie will stick around (or deer in Easter baskets 🤔) but this year it feels pretty right. Happy Easter friends. Xo 🕊💜🦁 #seekthesimplicity #flashesofdelight #happyeaster #honestmotherhood #letthembelittle #momtogs
Today was a really good day which our family has really needed as of late. We went to the sweetest little Easter egg hunt at my grandma’s assisted living facility that had four other kids in the two and under group so it was slow and cute and just about perfect. I couldn’t believe how fast Leo caught on to the concept of finding eggs and then putting them in his basket. Tbh I was kinda expecting to have to do the work for him. We had to cancel a much anticipated weekend away when I got sick so even though cousin time and the aquarium would have been super fun, this special little event was a pretty dang good consolation prize. And the look on my grandma’s face? Priceless. 🕊💜🦁
Thanks for the love yesterday friends. Was feeling a bit better this AM so we went by the pop-up at @wearethelocal with @mirandasflowersco and @layeredcakeartistry where we snagged some incredible heirloom daffodils and tulips and some tasty treats. I feel so thankful that small businesses and events like this have been getting the attention they deserve in our area in recent years. Sure, The Olive Gardens parking lot will always be confusingly packed but you know what, we arrived just as the pop up opened and within minutes they were packed too. I love (and appreciate!) the sense of community that this area has been working on and so thrilled to support businesses, events and people like this. Now then, I’m going to take a nap. Happy Saturday friends. Xo 🕊💜🦁 #seekthesimplicity #flashesofdelight #mynameismama #darlingweekend #pursuepretty
I’ve been feeling really under the weather lately and was briefly admitted on L&D yesterday with low blood pressures, nausea and vomiting. I’m fine, baby’s fine but I am so thankful to work at the hospital because, dang, if it isn’t easy to head to the birth center when something just doesn’t feel right, or in my case, you can’t stand up without extreme fatigue, the idea of food causes dry heaving and everyone tells you that you look like hell. On a positive note, Carlos surprised me with shutting off the annoying confirmation honk my Jeep does when I lock it and really, you guys, that’s my love language. Happy Friday from my bed where I drink all the water and take all the naps. Xo 🕊💜🦁 #seekthesimplicity #honestmotherhood #thirdtrimester #flashesofdelight #mynameismama
Siri set reminder to hide beloved snow boots during nap time 🕊💜🦁 #letthembelittle #seekthesimplicity #theartofslowliving #thehappynow #flashesofdelight #motherhood
When I was in an L&D rotation in nursing school there were a set of twins born and one had died. We were instructed not to go in the room and a symbol was placed outside the door indicating to staff a death had occurred. I never saw the door open, never saw the faces of the family trying not to drown inside. I had nothing to compare motherhood to and no way to understand the magnitude of loss occurring behind that door. —- On the first night laboring with Leo I heard alarms outside my room that I knew indicated emergency. I heard the overhead pages, I could feel chaos. Hours later while on a 3 am walk to slow contractions, we walked by the room where I could only assume a very unexpected fetal demise and emergent situation had occurred. I saw the same symbol and I felt like I couldn’t breathe. I wanted to run to that mother, scoop her up and sob with her, filling her empty arms with love. —- I think about these two moms regularly, wonder who they are, what their children’s names are and wish there was a way I could tell them I’m sorry that I was outside their door and like everyone else, could do nothing to help their pain. I also think about the time between these two events when that symbol was on my door and people walked by with the same amount of helplessness as I labored and held Sylvia. It’s terrifyingly heartbreaking to me, having been in each role, that I have no idea whether it’s better or worse to know too little or to know too much. 🕊💜🦁
I struggle often with knowing if I am doing ‘enough’ to bring Sylvia into our world physically. I constantly fear I’m failing at teaching Leo how important and loved she is as his sister, not just his sister that died. It should be the two of them, learning and growing and it still sometimes takes my breath away when I think too specifically about the details of the past two and half years of our lives. We miss you little dove and love you so very, very much. Happy monthiversary my angel. 🕊💜🦁
Feeling my very predictable seasonal restlessness, compounded by a physically tough pregnancy, a toddler who’s a wrecking ball, personal changes on the horizon and a tightened budget due to all the aforementioned reasons. Ahhh spring. I know you’re here when I feel the need to escape on a vacation, throw away my entire wardrobe, make a drastic hair change, bulldoze my backyard, repaint the house and make a bunch of irresponsible purchases. 🕊💜🦁 #motherhoodunplugged #seekthesimplicity #theartofslowliving #spring #pursuepretty #thatsdarling